Bonus Episode: Red Flag or Green Flag, Part 2, Real Life, Real Decisions

What if the small decisions you make every day are actually telling the truth about your life?

In episode 34 of The Influence Exchange, we’re bringing back something interactive, Red Flag or Green Flag: Part 2.

This isn’t about judging people. This isn’t about being perfect. This is about awareness.

Because sometimes the things we normalize are the exact things holding us back.

 Here’s how it works:
 You’ll hear real-life scenarios across:

Leadership, Money, Relationships, Mindset, Friends & Environment, Family & Real Life

After each one, you pause and ask yourself: Is this a red flag or a green flag?

Not what sounds right. Not what you think you “should” say. But what’s actually true for you.

In this episode, we break down:

Why leadership is about consistency not just showing up in problems

How emotional spending quietly creates financial stress

The truth about avoiding hard conversations

Why waiting to feel ready keeps you stuck

How your environment shapes your standards

And why staying busy can be a form of avoidance

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Let's make this real right away. What if small decisions you're making every day are actually telling the truth about your life? Red flag or green flag? What's up my friends? Welcome back to the Influence Exchange. Thank you for pressing play. Thank you for watching on YouTube, and thank you for listening wherever you are. If you're new here, I'm your host, JV, and this space is where we talk about real life, not perfect life. And today we're bringing back something different, something a little more interactive, something real. This isn't about judging people. This isn't about being perfect. This is about awareness because sometimes the things we normalize are actually holding us back. So here's how this work. I'm going to give you real life scenarios about leadership, money, relationships, mindset, friends, family, and everyday situations, and your job is simple. Ask yourself, is this a red flag or a green flag? And don't rush it because the goal isn't to answer fast, the goal is to answer honestly. Now let's get into it. Alright my friends, let's start here. And before we jump into the first scenario, let me quickly explain how this works so you can actually play along with me. I'm going to give you a real life situation. After each one, I want you to pause for a second, don't rush it, and ask yourself, is this a red flag or a green flag? Not what sounds right, not what you think I'm going to say, what you actually believe. If you're watching on YouTube, drop your answers in the comments. If you're listening, say it out loud or just be honest with yourself. Because this isn't about getting the right answer. This is about awareness. And here is the important part. Sometimes the red flags we point out in others are the same ones we need to recognize in ourselves. Let's get into it. Scenario number one. A leader only shows up when something goes wrong, but is nowhere to be seen when things are running smoothly. Pause for a moment. Think about it. Don't answer too quickly. Is this a red flag or a green flag? My answer is a red flag, and here's why. Leadership isn't just about stepping in during problems, it's about presence, it's about consistency, it's about setting the tone every single day, not just when things fall apart. Because if the only time people see you is when something is wrong, they don't experience you as support. They experience you as pressure. Over time, that creates a culture where people feel tense instead of motivated, where they try to avoid mistakes instead of learning from them. Strong leadership looks different. It shows up when things are going well, it recognizes effort, it build relationship, it creates stability, not just solutions. So if you're leading a team or even leading yourself, ask, am I only showing up when things go wrong or am I showing up consistently? Scenario number two. A leader only admits when they're wrong in front of their team. Pause for a minute. Think about it. Is it a red flag or a green flag? My answer is a green flag. And this matters more than most people think. When a leader admits they're wrong, they're not losing authority, they're building trust. They're showing I'm human, I take accountability, I'm willing to improve, and that creates something powerful. It gives others permission to be honest too. Because let me be real, no one fully trusts a leader who acts like they have all the answers. But people respect a leader who can say, I got that wrong, and I make it right. That builds trust, that builds connection, that builds leadership. Let me pause you here for a second. Out of those two scenarios, which one stood out to you more? The first one or the second one? And most importantly, which one do you recognize in yourself? Because this isn't about judging anyone else, it's about becoming aware of your own patterns. Real quick before we move on, if you're watching on YouTube, subscribe to the channel. If you're listening on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or anywhere else, follow the podcast so you don't miss what's next. If you're into real, honest conversation like this, you're exactly where you need to be. Alright, let's keep going. Alright my friends, let's shift into money. Before we get into the next scenario, let's reset for a moment because this is where things start to get real. And quick reminder how this works. I'm going to give you a situation. Pause for a moment, don't answer too quickly. Ask yourself honestly, is this a red flag or a green flag? And I really want you to think about this one. Because when it comes to money, most people don't struggle because they don't know what to do. They struggle because of their habits, they struggle because of their emotions. So don't answer based on what sounds right. Answer based on what you actually do. And if you're watching on YouTube, drop your answers in the comments. If you're listening, take a moment and be honest with yourself. Alright, let's get into it. Scenario number three. You reward yourself with spending every time you feel stressed. Pause for a moment. Don't skip this part. Think about it. Is it a red flag or a green flag? My answer is red flag. Let's break it down simply. This isn't really about money. It's about how you handle stress. You feel stress, you spend, and in that moment you feel better. But then what happens? That feeling fades, the stress comes back, and now you're added financial pressure on top of it. So now you're dealing with stress and the result of a decision made it that moment. And this is where it turns into a cycle. Your brain starts to learn spending makes me feel better. So the next time stress shows up, the urge to spend shows up. That's how habits form. Not because you're bad with money, but because your brain is looking for relief. And over time, that adds up, not just financially, but mentally and emotionally as well. So here's a real question for you. When you feel stressed, what do you turn to? Because your answer says a lot about your habits. Scenario number four, you choose to delay small rewards today for something greater later. Pause for a moment. Think about it. Is it a red flag or a green flag? My answer is green flag. This is how wealth is actually built. Not through big flashy moments, not through one perfect decision, but through quiet discipline, small choices, and consistent actions over time. It looks like saving instead of spending, waiting instead of reacting, thinking long term instead of short term. And let's be honest, it doesn't always feel good in the moment. You're choosing to say no now for something better later. That takes patience, that takes awareness, and that takes discipline. But here's what it builds control, stability, trust in yourself, and that's where real financial peace begins. Let me pause you here for a moment. Between those two scenarios, which one felt more familiar to you? Be honest, was it spending when you're stressed or delaying gratification? Again, this isn't about judging yourself, it's about recognizing patterns. And once you recognize a pattern, you can start to change it. And if this is making you think differently about your habits, that's exactly the goal. And if you're getting value from this, make sure you follow the podcast. And if you're watching on YouTube, subscribe. We're going to keep having real conversations like this. Let's keep going. Alright my friends, let's slow this down and talk about relationships. And same format here. I'm going to give you a scenario. You pause, you think, and answer honestly. Is it a red flag or a green flag? Scenario number five. You avoid difficult conversations to keep the peace. Pause for a moment. Really think about it. Is it a red flag or a green flag? My answer is red flag. Let's break it down simply. A lot of people tell themselves I don't want drama, I just want things to stay calm. It's not worth bringing up. But here's the truth. That's not peace, that's avoidance. Real peace isn't pretending everything is fine. It's being able to talk about what matters without everything falling apart. When you avoid hard conversations, the issue doesn't go away. It gets pushed down and over time what happens? Frustration built, resentment built, misunderstandings grow until one day it all comes out at once. Louder, more emotional, harder to control. So what feels like keeping the peace now often creates more tension later. Let me ask you something. Is there something you've been avoiding saying? Because if there is, it probably matters. Scenario number six, you're able to communicate honestly without attacking or shutting down. Pause for a moment, think about it. Is it a red flag or green flag? My answer is green flag. This one matters. Communication isn't just about speaking, it's about how you show up in the conversation, being able to say, This is how I feel, this is what's bothering me, this is what I need. Without attacking, without blaming, and without shutting down, that's emotional maturity. And let's be honest, it's not always easy, it can feel uncomfortable, you won't always have the perfect words, but choosing to communicate instead of avoidance, that's growth. Because strong relationships aren't built on perfection, they're built on honesty and respect. Let me pause you here for a moment. Be honest with yourself. Do you tend to avoid difficult conversations or step into them? No judgment, just awareness. Because once you recognize the pattern, you can start changing how you show up. Let's keep going. Alright, my friends, let's talk about mindset because this right here affects everything. Your decisions, your confidence, your growth. Same format. I'm going to give you a situation, pause, think about it, and answer honestly. Is it a red flag or green flag? Scenario number seven. You wait until you feel ready before taking action. Pause for a moment, don't rush it. Think about your own life. Is it a red flag or a green flag? My answer is red flag. This one catches a lot of people because it sounds responsible, even smart. I just need more time. I want to feel ready first. I start when I feel confident, but here's the reality. Readiness doesn't come before action, it comes after it. Most people think confidence shows up first and then they begin. But it works the other way around. You begin and confidence builds along the way. If you keep waiting to feel ready, you end up waiting longer than you need to. So what happens? You delay, you overthink, you talk yourself out of it, not because you can't do it, but because you haven't started yet. So let me ask you something simple. What are you waiting to feel ready for right now? Because chances are starting is what will make you feel ready. Scenario number eight, you take small action even when you don't feel confident. Pause for a moment. Think about it. Is it a red flag or green flag? My answer is green flag. This is where momentum starts. Not big action, not perfect action, small action. It looks like taking one step, trying once, showing up when it's not perfect. And here's what happens. You take action, you learn, you build a little confidence, you take another step. That's how momentum grows. Confidence isn't something you wait for, it's something you build. And the people who move forward aren't always the most confident, they're the ones willing to start. Let me pause you here for a moment. Be honest with yourself. Are you waiting to feel ready or taking action anyway? With no judgment, just awareness. Because once you move from waiting to doing, everything begins to shift. Let's keep going. Alright, my friends, let's talk about your circle, your environment, the people you spend time with, because whether we realize it or not, this shapes more of your life than you think. Same format. I'm going to give you a situation, pause, think about it, and answer honestly. Is it a red flag or green flag? Scenario number nine. Your circle discourages growth or change. Pause for a moment. Think about your environment. Is it a red flag or green flag? My answer is red flag. This one can be tough to recognize. It's not always obvious. It really sounds like don't grow, don't improve. Sometimes it sounds like you've changed. Why are you doing all that? That's too much. Just relax. On the surface, it may seem harmless, but underneath it can hold you back. Because the truth is your environment shapes your standards. If the people around you don't push themselves, don't grow, and don't think long term, that becomes your normal. And when growth starts to feel different, you may begin to shrink just to stay comfortable. So you ask yourself, do you feel supported when you're trying to grow? Or do you feel like you have to explain yourself because that feeling matters? Scenario number 10. Your circle supports you and pushes you to grow. Pause for a moment. Think about it. Is it a red flag or green flag? My answer is green flag. That's alignment. It doesn't mean your circle is perfect. It means they're intentional. They support your goals, they challenge your thinking, they encourage you to improve, they hold you accountable, and sometimes they tell you what you need to hear, not just what you want to hear. That's real support. Because growth isn't always comfortable, and the right people won't let you stay stuck. They push you to level up. Let me pause here for a moment. Be honest with yourself. Does your environment move you forward or keep you where you are? No judgment, just awareness. Because once you recognize the influence around you, you can start choosing it intentionally. Alright, let's keep going. Alright, my friends, let's bring this into real life. Your day-to-day, your habits, the things no one else really sees, because this is where everything we're talked about actually shows up. Same format. I'm going to give you a scenario, pause, think about it, and answer honestly. Is it a red flag or green flag? Scenario number 11. You stay busy to avoid dealing with personal issues. Pause for a moment, think about it. Is it a red flag or green flag? My answer is red flag. And this one shows up more often than people realize. Because being busy can look like progress. You're working, you're moving, you're getting things done, but the real question is what are you avoiding? Because sometimes being busy isn't growth, it's a distraction. It's a way to fill your time so you don't have to face stress, uncertainty, emotions, difficult conversations, decisions you've been putting off. And here's the reality: what you avoid doesn't disappear, it weights, and it usually comes back heavier than before. So let me ask you something honestly. When things feel heavy, do you slow down and face it or speed up to avoid it? Because the answer tells you a lot. Scenario number 12. You take time to reflect and understand your patterns. Pause for a moment, think about it is it a red flag or green flag? My answer is green flag. This is where real change starts. Not when everything is perfect, not when life feels easy, but when you slow down enough to notice. Notice your habits, notice your reactions, notice what keeps repeating because patterns reveal the truth. If something keeps showing up in your life, there's usually something deeper behind it. And reflection brings clarity. It helps you understand why you react the way you do, why you make certain decisions, what needs to change, and once you see it clearly, you can begin to change it. Let me pause you here for a moment. Be honest with yourself. Are you staying busy or being intentional with no judgment, just awareness? Because once you slow down and recognize your patterns, that's where real growth begins. Alright, let's close this out strong. Alright, my friends, let's bring this all together. This episode wasn't about labeling people. It wasn't about being perfect. It was about recognizing patterns. Because red flags don't mean you're failing, they mean you're becoming aware. And awareness, that's where real change begins. And green flags, those are the habits you build on, the ones you lean into, the ones you repeat, the ones that steadily move in your life forward. And let's keep this simple. This week, just notice one red flag. That's it. Don't try to fix everything. Don't overwhelm yourself. Don't turn it into pressure. Just notice it. Because once you see something clearly, you give yourself the opportunity to change. That's how growth really works. Small awareness, small adjustments, real progress. Before I go, I want to say thank you. Thank you for pressing play. Thank you for listening. Thank you for watching on YouTube. I truly appreciate you taking the time to be here with me. And if you're watching this on YouTube, make sure you hit the subscribe button. And if you're listening on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or any other platform, follow the podcast so you don't miss out on the next episode. Because we're going to keep having real honest conversations like this. And remember, your influence grows every time you choose courage over comfort. I'm JV. Stay curious, stay consistent, and keep influencing others. Thank you guys. I appreciate all of you. Much love.